Festival

But I am not happy with myself! This is festival time. The best season of a year. Durga Puja, Diwali, Brother's Day etc. How much I longed for these and enjoyed these even a few years back! Even when future was so much uncertain. Thought that a Government job would be all fun, never mind the 0.33X salary. I shall have time for myself, family and friends and enjoy life to its full. Few days back somebody remarked what had been his motivation behind accepting a low paid Government job. To be able to say 'NO' to any undue pressure from boss which perhaps one cannot avoid in a high paid industry job.

But being in IIT is more than a doing a Government job. There is so much opportunity! It is very difficult not to spend even the last single available minute for the cause. There is classroom teaching. There is project work under curricula - for me, mostly the disinterested bottomers, to extract work out of them! There are sponsored projects - 4 of them, its evaluation, delivery according to timelines! There are international collaborations to nurture which gives opportunity to grow exponentially! There is a requirement to extend support to research groups inside IIT whenever needed and also participate in team work like curricula development for new discipline! There are short term courses to be offered when such requests come from important Government functionary. There are research papers to review for others and own students. There are requests to be in technical committee or simply committee of many things. There are new frontiers to be explored i.e. submission of new research proposals. There are administartive work - playing host to visitors, being coordinator of various activities.....

To top all these there are deadlines of different work elements for each each of above. With no secretarial facility it is a big pain to remember all of them and prepare for them. As I mentioned in some other post that I don't get bright students and my research students are just average. I am getting work from them keeping them fully focussed and dont want to delegate anything to them. It is difficult to explain this to many who think (from our group's contribution) that there are many students working with me and we have sufficient bench strength.

And I would also like to point out that we too have responsibilities towards family and friends without whom we wouldn't have been here.

The two works after my heart had been writing manuscript for the new editions of the two books and mentoring UG 1st and 2nd year NSS students. I wish I could give maximum time to these two activities as they can make maximum impact in the society as far as my contribution is concerned. The Durga Puja vacation thus was mostly spent in manuscript writing. Coming Diwali would also be the same. The deadline is 31st Oct. for one book. Cannot but say 'No' to sister's earnest appeal to celebrate brother's day next week. No time for myself, family. I know that if I request the deadline will be extended again, for the second time. But I don't want do that repeatedly and dilute the high standard I had set in previous two editions of those two books. Let's see if my sister can make it to Kharagpur.

I am very happay with my NSS team VIVEK (http://teamvivek.50webs.com/), a significant percentage of them are really serious. Hope and pray that I play my role sincerely in imbibing in this team the spirit of sacrifice and service and they become worthy citizen of this country. So far they have prepared to organize a kid's event of 2-3 hour duration which is 5-6 activity based like song, science expt., funny video, quiz, play zone, drama. The theme is patriotism but will be loaded with fun too. The plan is to host it in various primary schools around IIT Campus. Also they are developing teaching modules for kids who do not get formal education. Next week, we are starting a study circle within this team. First week the students proposed to take up 'Chicago Address' of Vivekananda 'I have a Dream' of Martin Luthar King.

During Durga Puja visited Dakshineshwar and Belur Math on Saptami. Interacted with local club at our native place and partcipated in their philanthropic activity on Shasthi evening. Prepared one upgradation plan for the local public library. The Puja vacation was really enjoyable. Back here unhappy finding myself spread too far and too thin and nobody can take a 'NO'. I find my concentration level has reduced by few dB compared to what it had been in the Puja week. I am not enjoying it. I need to learn time management, ability to say 'No' and stay focussed. God, please help me!